The art of…
…the straight face. As it was taught to me, I hope to pass it on to you. Simply, feel free to take a risk and go where your story takes you. A little laughter is better than crying.
In these on-line exercises the name of the “unsuspecting player” has been slightly changed to protect their identity.
----- Original note -----
Date: Jul.13.2005 08:43
From: AsReal_AsYou
To: MisterChris
Subject: No subject
AsReal_AsYou: good morning, how are you?
MC: I can't complain. How are you?
AsReal_AsYou: Im good too I work third shift so im just happy to be home
MC: Yeah, that's a whole other world. What do you do?
AsReal_AsYou: I work for Bank of America doing data entry and whatever else they force us to do lol, we have alot of work and a little bit of people because of the layoffs so they have us all doing too much, what do you do?
MC: I'm a designer/art director/last-minute-go-to-guy for a local university. I also freelance as a superhero by the name of the Chocolate Thunder Boy Wonder. However, that is part of my dark disturbing side that I don't want to get into right now.
AsReal_AsYou: Super Hero wow sounds interesting
MC: It's really not. It’s a lot of lonely nights just sitting around checking the gadgets on my utility belt waiting for something to happen. Sometimes I wonder if I chose the right line of work. Maybe I'd like to be something like a carpenter, or loan officer. Then at least I'd just have a single identity. And that means I'd just have to do my taxes only once.
AsReal_AsYou: Sounds like hard work, do you save lives?
MC: Well of course I do. I wouldn't be much of a superhero if I just showed up to a burning building and barely managed to turn the hydrant on and calm people down until 911 arrived. But with all the lives I've saved it seems the only life I can't save is my own. I can't even remember the last time I went to a movie or even had someone over for dinner.
AsReal_AsYou: oh poor baby but im sure that the fact that you do good deeds should be rewarding to you
MC: It was until my job switched my health insurance to an HMO. Now every time I go to the emergency room I have to shell out $150 out of my own pocket. It's to the point I'm afraid of taking a bullet. Sometimes I really have to think, ok....leap off this building and risk getting hurt or take the stairs and use the money you would have paid in the emergency room on groceries or the gas bill.
AsReal_AsYou: lol you are too funny, so has anyone ever figured out your secret identity?
MC: Ummm, yeah. My dog. But he can't talk, so my secret is safe with him. But, just to be on the safe side I made him my sidekick. If I go down…that loose-lipped little bastard goes down with me.
AsReal_AsYou: is your dogs name duke like in the beans commercial? do you have a super hero suit
MC: Beans commercial? What the in the name of holy hot dogs are you talking about? I’m sorry but it’s kinda hard to watch primetime TV while punching out super villains. I suppose that I could install a mini-console in my power glove, but with no cable connection what in the hell am I going to watch? PBS? Fox? Come on I’m a superhero…I don’t have time for the boob-tube. And my dog’s name is simply “dog”. Animals that are won in poker games in the middle of the Mexican badlands shouldn’t expect much. Plus, I’m so broke right now he’s lucky I don’t call him dinner.
AsReal_AsYou: do you have a super hero suit?
MC: Yeah, I HAD a nice superhero suit. But things like gamma death rays, below-freezing temperatures, and razor-sharp bites and scratches from the Evil Women of the Jaded Black Widow Clan tend to wear on a fabric. And as I’ve already established, my budget doesn’t exactly allow for a weekly dry cleaning anymore. So instead of replacing worn out equipment I am forced to patch it up and recycle. Plus, I have to limit my shopping to WalMart or Building 19. I mean, being able to withstand the intense heat of reentering the Earth’s atmosphere used to be my minimum requirement for a garment…now, I’m happy just to find something within my budget that will color coordinate. *Sigh* I’m getting depressed.
AsReal_AsYou: Oh, i see so what does it look like.
MC: Like this.*
AsReal_AsYou: whats this?
MC: Nothing to be scared of young citizen.
AsReal_AsYou: that didnt answer the question, what is it?
MC: If I tell you it kinda defeats the purpose of the joke. But if you must know before visiting the link, you asked what the Chocolate Thunder's suit looked like...so it is simply a link to an image of a pathetic costume. As I said, nothing to be scared of. *sound of a balloon deflating*
AsReal_AsYou: ok im sorry i ruined it
~~~~~~~~~~~~
* Side note: I always knew that I’d get busted one day. It’s no secret that I like to incorporate a little imagery into my stories. However, a brother doesn’t own any web space, so it’s always been someone else's picture on someone else’s dime. (I know, for shame MC.....for shame.) Well, someone called me out and I have to tip my hat off to them for allowing me to go on with my bootleg blog. With that said show some respect to theresistancearmy.com.
Personally, if I found out someone was leeching off of me I’d be heated. I’d quietly switch the image to something else but keep the name the same. Then I’d just sit back and watch the offender explain to his readers why he chose to display an an.imal/hu.man in.ter.cour.se pic or something tasteful like that on their blog. But everybody already knows, besides being a newly convicted image bandit...I'm a petty bastard.
In these on-line exercises the name of the “unsuspecting player” has been slightly changed to protect their identity.
----- Original note -----
Date: Jul.13.2005 08:43
From: AsReal_AsYou
To: MisterChris
Subject: No subject
AsReal_AsYou: good morning, how are you?
MC: I can't complain. How are you?
AsReal_AsYou: Im good too I work third shift so im just happy to be home
MC: Yeah, that's a whole other world. What do you do?
AsReal_AsYou: I work for Bank of America doing data entry and whatever else they force us to do lol, we have alot of work and a little bit of people because of the layoffs so they have us all doing too much, what do you do?
MC: I'm a designer/art director/last-minute-go-to-guy for a local university. I also freelance as a superhero by the name of the Chocolate Thunder Boy Wonder. However, that is part of my dark disturbing side that I don't want to get into right now.
AsReal_AsYou: Super Hero wow sounds interesting
MC: It's really not. It’s a lot of lonely nights just sitting around checking the gadgets on my utility belt waiting for something to happen. Sometimes I wonder if I chose the right line of work. Maybe I'd like to be something like a carpenter, or loan officer. Then at least I'd just have a single identity. And that means I'd just have to do my taxes only once.
AsReal_AsYou: Sounds like hard work, do you save lives?
MC: Well of course I do. I wouldn't be much of a superhero if I just showed up to a burning building and barely managed to turn the hydrant on and calm people down until 911 arrived. But with all the lives I've saved it seems the only life I can't save is my own. I can't even remember the last time I went to a movie or even had someone over for dinner.
AsReal_AsYou: oh poor baby but im sure that the fact that you do good deeds should be rewarding to you
MC: It was until my job switched my health insurance to an HMO. Now every time I go to the emergency room I have to shell out $150 out of my own pocket. It's to the point I'm afraid of taking a bullet. Sometimes I really have to think, ok....leap off this building and risk getting hurt or take the stairs and use the money you would have paid in the emergency room on groceries or the gas bill.
AsReal_AsYou: lol you are too funny, so has anyone ever figured out your secret identity?
MC: Ummm, yeah. My dog. But he can't talk, so my secret is safe with him. But, just to be on the safe side I made him my sidekick. If I go down…that loose-lipped little bastard goes down with me.
AsReal_AsYou: is your dogs name duke like in the beans commercial? do you have a super hero suit
MC: Beans commercial? What the in the name of holy hot dogs are you talking about? I’m sorry but it’s kinda hard to watch primetime TV while punching out super villains. I suppose that I could install a mini-console in my power glove, but with no cable connection what in the hell am I going to watch? PBS? Fox? Come on I’m a superhero…I don’t have time for the boob-tube. And my dog’s name is simply “dog”. Animals that are won in poker games in the middle of the Mexican badlands shouldn’t expect much. Plus, I’m so broke right now he’s lucky I don’t call him dinner.
AsReal_AsYou: do you have a super hero suit?
MC: Yeah, I HAD a nice superhero suit. But things like gamma death rays, below-freezing temperatures, and razor-sharp bites and scratches from the Evil Women of the Jaded Black Widow Clan tend to wear on a fabric. And as I’ve already established, my budget doesn’t exactly allow for a weekly dry cleaning anymore. So instead of replacing worn out equipment I am forced to patch it up and recycle. Plus, I have to limit my shopping to WalMart or Building 19. I mean, being able to withstand the intense heat of reentering the Earth’s atmosphere used to be my minimum requirement for a garment…now, I’m happy just to find something within my budget that will color coordinate. *Sigh* I’m getting depressed.
AsReal_AsYou: Oh, i see so what does it look like.
MC: Like this.*
AsReal_AsYou: whats this?
MC: Nothing to be scared of young citizen.
AsReal_AsYou: that didnt answer the question, what is it?
MC: If I tell you it kinda defeats the purpose of the joke. But if you must know before visiting the link, you asked what the Chocolate Thunder's suit looked like...so it is simply a link to an image of a pathetic costume. As I said, nothing to be scared of. *sound of a balloon deflating*
AsReal_AsYou: ok im sorry i ruined it
~~~~~~~~~~~~
* Side note: I always knew that I’d get busted one day. It’s no secret that I like to incorporate a little imagery into my stories. However, a brother doesn’t own any web space, so it’s always been someone else's picture on someone else’s dime. (I know, for shame MC.....for shame.) Well, someone called me out and I have to tip my hat off to them for allowing me to go on with my bootleg blog. With that said show some respect to theresistancearmy.com.
Personally, if I found out someone was leeching off of me I’d be heated. I’d quietly switch the image to something else but keep the name the same. Then I’d just sit back and watch the offender explain to his readers why he chose to display an an.imal/hu.man in.ter.cour.se pic or something tasteful like that on their blog. But everybody already knows, besides being a newly convicted image bandit...I'm a petty bastard.
