In a nutshell.

1. I don’t own an X-Box or PlayStation, but I’ve spent over two decades and thousands of dollars within the arcades of Chinatown and the Back Bay. I’ve paid too many dues to be rocked on anybody’s little game. Yeah, he’s my boy, but I’m quick to spank that tons-of-sh*t-talkin’, every-game-ever-made-havin’, excuse-about-the-control-not-workin’, ego…while eating his girl’s cooking and drinking his beer. No love….that’s how I do. Those Asian middle school kids never had any love for me.



2. Nothin’ like a carnival in the ghetto. After seeing all of the people that will come out for the promise of a $20.00 – two dollar stuffed animal you start to realize Carnie Folk really aren’t all that strange. It looked like graffiti characters had come to life.



3. There is this free local paper I pick up every week to keep up on what’s going on in the neighborhood. Didn’t I see these crackheads selling this paper for a buck a pop…. right next to the free newspaper box? And people were buying it! Damn, I’m in the wrong business.



4. How did I go from being a part time project consultant to fulltime project leader? I guess I’m not good at ignoring dropped balls when they roll past my feet.



5. At first I thought this movie about my neighborhood was gonna be garbage, but I was surprised to find out it wasn't half bad. Not great, but not bad.



6. Give me any prehistoric animal that's been found frozen in the Artic, some charcoal and a grill….and I can make it taste good.



7. My legs have been killing me for about a month. Every morning I wake up with bruises as if someone had hit me with a hammer, but I can’t seem to identify how I’ve hurt them. Last week I decided to take a friend’s advice and limp my sorry @ss to the doctor.



8. My primary care doctor mainly caters to the gay community. Every once and a while I’ll run into someone I know from college in her office and they’ll give me that look like, “Oh, my God….Chris….you?!!” Ummm…no, dog…..no.



9. My doctor’s assistant giggled when I told her my fears of having blood clots or some sort of poisoning and having to get my money-makers amputated. Then she gave me a pack of ice and prescribed me regular over the counter Tylenol.



10. This weekend while up on a ladder I was extending myself to paint the far corner of a wall and I realized that I had been pressing my legs up against the metal steps of the ladder to stabilize myself. I had been doing this for months.